TALES FROM THE CARIBBEAN

After the union boss told the same story twice at Sloppy Joe’s, Dave excused himself and walked back to their beach house. It was hot and he was sitting on the porch when a raven-haired, brown-eyed beauty rode up on her bicycle. Although it was dark, when she dismounted her bicycle, he noticed that she was wearing panties of a very exciting nature. He saw her earlier in the day, but he didn’t think she had noticed him. She was the daughter of the Cuban lady who was staying there and doing the cooking and cleaning for them. Dave didn’t move and he watched as she checked on her mother, came back out and was about to ride off again when he asked what her name was.

“My name is Carmen,” she replied. “What’s your name?”

“My friends call me Enzo,” he replied. “How old are you?” he asked.

“Fifteen,” she said, “but I’m almost 16. How old are you?”

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“We’re the same age,” said Enzo.

“May I ask, where you are off to,” Enzo politely inquired.

“I’m going to meet some friends on the beach. Would you like to join us?” asked Carmen.

There were several bicycles parked next to Carmen’s and she offered one of them to Enzo. She said it belonged to her friend Lolita and she wouldn’t mind if he used it. Carmen rode off into the darkness of that hot, steamy, Key West night and Enzo followed her. Soon they arrived at the beach where her friends were partying. Enzo smelled shrimp—it was beginning to boil. Somebody passed him a fat marijuana joint, but Enzo passed it on, smiled and politely said that he didn’t smoke when he was in training. They offered him a cold Heinekens beer and he declined that too because alcohol makes him sick but, he said, “No Thanks, I’m not drinking today.” He offered to pay for the shrimp and everything else too because seafood was his thing. He eats a lot of it and he didn’t want them to think of him as a moocher.

Somebody asked, “Where are you from?”

“Down island,” replied Enzo. He was shy, but he was also cautious about saying much before he knew whom he was talking to. Somebody else asked him what he was doing in Key West and he said that his Dad was a boat captain and they were there waiting for some boat parts to arrive from Miami.

No sooner were introductions finished than three bums appeared out of the darkness. The leader was a big ugly man who asked them for something to drink. The person sitting next to the cooler said, “No way, buy your own!” The biggest bum said, “It ain’t nice not to share, but I’ll make you a deal, if you share your cooler with us, I won’t cut you and take it.”

The bum overlooked Enzo who was on his feet and when the bum appeared to go for a knife–Enzo acted. His back foot quietly replaced his front foot as it shot forward and he unleashed a fist of stone whose first and second knuckle hit the bully squarely on the nose and sent him crashing to the ground. Enzo moved towards the other bums and asked them if they wanted some of the same, but they backed away saying, “No man, we don’t want no trouble.”

Enzo said, “Now, I’ll make you a deal. Get that bum out of my sight and I won’t cut him up and put him in my chum bucket.” The other bums helped their buddy to his feet and although his nose was badly broken and it was gushing blood–they carted him away.

Dave looked at the other partier’s who seemed to be in shock and put matters at ease, by chuckling and casually remarking, “Now, how about that shrimp.” Carmen was greatly impressed by the way Enzo stood up to the bad guy and she snuggled up next to him while he gorged himself on fresh shrimp. Soon there was a pile of shrimp remains piled between his feet. Somebody got out their guitar and began a rendition of Jimmy Buffet songs.

“Yes, I am a pirate, two hundred years too late, there’s nothing to plunder, the canons don’t thunder, I’m an over forty victim of fate.” Enzo and Carmen laid back and looked at the stars.

One thing led to another and although neither Enzo nor Carmen had ever had sex, she decided it was time. It didn’t go well for them and finally in total frustration they gave up the idea. The sun was beginning to rise and so they got on their bicycles and peddled back to the cottage. Carmen was trying to be brave but she was in great pain and was barely able to ride her bicycle.

The captain was passed out and snoring so, Enzo quietly slipped into his own bedroom. When Carmen’s mother awoke and saw Carmen sitting next to her bed crying she figured out what had happened and as soon as Carmen left she confronted the sleeping captain. The captain speaks little Spanish and was able to understand only about every third word she said. He listened for a while and finally said, “My son wouldn’t do a thing like that,” and handed the irate mother a hundred dollar bill and told her to go buy some new panties.” The confrontation ended and the captain returned to bed and grumbled, “It’s a dirty rotten shame what a man has to do to get any sleep around here.”

Enzo pretended to be asleep thru the whole sordid affair, but soon he joined his father in peaceful slumber. Several hours later Enzo awoke and saw Carmen’s mother going into his Dad’s bedroom again. He braced himself for round two, but evidently she had resolved herself to the fact that her daughter was no longer a virgin and now she was trying to make up to his Dad. When Enzo looked into his Dad’s bedroom he saw Carmen’s mother riding him like a rented mule. He was embarrassed and confused at once so he quietly exited to the front porch. Carmen rode up on her bicycle and when she asked where her mother was Enzo told her–she’s in dad’s bedroom having sex with him—go figure. Earlier in the day she was cussing at him like sixty mad mothers and now she was having sex with him—who can figure women?

Carmen apologized for not being able to finish what they started the night before and said her girl friend Lolita had explained the secrets of womanhood to her.

“Maybe,” she said, “We could try again in a few days?”

Enzo’s cell phone rang and it was Big Jesse. He said that he had set everything up with his pilot and the company plane would be at the Key West Airport to pick them up the following Monday morning at 0900 hrs. At last, their journey to Grand Cayman Island could begin. Jesse asked if his dad was there and Enzo said yes, but he couldn’t come to the phone right now. “Well my boy,” said Jesse, when he’s available have him give me a ringy-dingy.”

“Will do,” said Enzo and Carmen began to sob.

“You’re leaving me,” she said.

“Only for a few days,” Enzo explained, “We have business to take care of on Grand Cayman Island and Havana and then we’re flying to Mexico City, but we’ll be back real soon. Please don’t cry,” he said.

After things quieted down in his dad’s bedroom a song of joy was heard and it was coming from Carmen’s mother.

“What’s she singing,” asked Enzo?

“A Cuban love song,” explained Carmen, my mother is in love.

To be continued…