MAE JULIAN
I wanted to pass along to you a message I got from my sister, Kathy, yesterday. I was most literally on my death bed, suffering the worst flu I can ever remember and being glad to be finally back in Louisville. It was then that I found my editor had gone through the same thing, yet… he was putting out the paper. I had told him I couldn’t crank out a column seeing as how I hadn’t long to live. He was patient, as always, and gave me an extra day after deadline.
Then, last night, as I was making my own funeral arrangements, and not thinking of the column, I got an email from my sister. It stopped me cold. I wanted to pass it on to my Waynedale friends, as it speaks of hope, eternal blessings and a promise from the gods that be, that life goes on:
Dear Mae,
Sometimes the smallest things seem to be the most profound:
Today I was drawn to a sunny spot in front of my window. I sat in my rocker and let the sun warm my body. The pond was mostly frozen and I watched the wind blow snow dust in circles and swirls over the surface. There was a little patch that was melted and two Canadian geese drifted across and made ripples and waves as they swam. Then, I noticed that the ice was so thin that it also moved like waves. It was a beautiful sight, and at that moment I felt blessed beyond words.
Love Kath
I sat at my computer for a long time after this, and remembered the times I have been caught totally off-guard by nature. It is as if God grabs you and says … look … behold what I have given you. One time I remember walking out of the doors of the ER and I looked to the Western sky. I saw what I had never seen before or since. The sky was completely blood red. I was so amazed that I was dumb-struck. An uppity elderly nurse came out directly after me, and she was one of coldest people I have ever had the misfortune of knowing. But I was so overwhelmed, I spoke to her: “Look at the sky!” I recall her glancing up and then continuing on her way as if nothing had been seen. It taught me something right there on the spot of the ambulance entrance. God can send you a gift, but if you refuse, in your arrogance, to acknowledge it, then it will fade as if it had never been, and you will be the poorer for it.
Now, on this day of thinking that I’m about to die, I am going to be grateful for having been given a body that will heal itself with no help from me. What a gift. And my resolution for today, on behalf of my sister, is to go outside, even if it takes five layers of clothes and every ounce of energy that I don’t have, and find something in the front yard to marvel at. I know is there. It is for me to find.
I hope all my Waynedale friends will find something to marvel at today. A reason to feel blessed no matter what your state of mind or health. Gifts exist. We only need to look. Let me know what you find on this day. I will print your responses. No “gift” is too small.
Love to all my Waynedale Friends,
Mae
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