TALES FROM THE CARIBBEAN

Sorority High Jinxes—This year’s deer hunt was a smashing success. The hunting was excellent, the weather perfect and Dave was able to spend some time with his dad’s other son, named Dave, who’s 32 years his senior. The last day before their departure Dave and his dad canned the meat they had harvested and built wooden crates in order to safely transport it back to St. John. Dave had heard precious little from Aura since she returned to school, but that was understandable because she was almost two month’s behind in her studies, she moved into a new dormitory and she was still getting to know her new roommate.

When Aura finally called Dave, he was sitting in a tree stand waiting for an unsuspecting deer to pass by, but she seemed out-of-sorts. He guessed that was to be expected because so many changes had occurred in her life, especially so soon after losing her father and then more recently her mother, but she was nevertheless struggling to remain upbeat. She mentioned that her new roommate’s name was Isabelle and although she was from a moneyed family and was too young to be frequenting bars, she regularly lied to her parents about staying with friends and was acting out her fantasy by pole dancing. Isabelle had confided her secret to Aura and made her promise never to tell, but Aura was suspicious of Isabelle’s twisted tale because it might be a set-up to see if she could be trusted? Isabelle reminded Aura of Delilah and therefore she was extremely uneasy around her–she didn’t trust her.

Dave and his dad’s flight ended at the St. Thomas tarmac and after they cleared customs and claimed their baggage they took a van-taxi to the Red Hook and caught the next Ferry Boat to St. John. It was good to be home again but Dave already missed the woods and the snow. He loved the snow because it reminded him of Bar Harbor, Maine one of his favorite places.

They stowed their luggage and hunting gear at the boat shack and walked to Boss Penny’s Place. The usual party was going on, but they were too tired to partake. The captain did, however, put a 3-pound roll of jalapeno and cheese, venison summer sausage on the bar that he had had processed at Lengerich Meats in Zanesville, Indiana–it was consumed in a flash. Lengerich summer sausage is a once-a-year treat for the regular customers at Boss Penny’s Caribbean Bar and Café, but the other 3 rolls were already stashed in their refrigerator at the boat shack.

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Dave gave a brief report of their deer hunt to Boss Penny and modestly under-stated his part in the hunt and said nothing about shooting three deer to his dad’s none, he simply said, “We harvested three deer.” Once they were back aboard the Flying Circus, Dave crawled into his bunk and fell fast asleep and the captain went to his cabin and did the same.

Dave was shocked back to consciousness by the sound of his ringing cell phone. He had an email coming in from Aura and when he looked at the clock it was 0300 hrs. It alarmed him that she was emailing him at that hour, but he sat up, turned the light on, and opened his phone. The email was a photo of the most graphic and shocking nature and he could barely believe what he was seeing—it was pure pornography. He was struck dumb; it couldn’t be from Aura, she was too modest to ever send such a thing and on closer inspection it became obvious that this outrageous image was not of Aura—the tops of the woman’s thighs in this image were far too large to be Aura’s not to mention the wrong hair color—nothing fit. Dave wasn’t fooled, but he was outraged that somebody was trying to fool him into believing his sweet princess would take such a rude and graphic image of herself. Dave immediately suspected Aura’s new roommate, she must have taken Aura’s cell phone from her after she fell asleep, shot the rude image of herself and sent it to him, and then she probably deleted it so Aura wouldn’t know what she did, or even worse, maybe Aura had been kidnapped and she was in danger?

Dave hurried aft to the Captain’s cabin and woke him up.

“Dad, look at this photo,” exclaimed Dave. “It was taken with Aura’s I-Phone camera, but whoever is in this picture it is not her—I’m really worried.”

“Let me see that picture,” grumbled the Captain as he squinted his eyes and fumbled for his glasses.

“Well, I’ll be hanged,” said the Captain. “If that don’t look like somebody has a Sasquatch in a headlock–I wonder who would do such a thing, mused the Captain?”

“Aura’s new roommate is the most likely culprit—she must have taken Aura’s cell phone from her purse after she fell asleep, then took the image of herself in the bathroom and sent it to me to make trouble,” stammered Dave.

“Beware son, it’s not wise to make assumptions. Wait until morning when you can call Aura. I’m sure she’s not aware of what’s going on.”

“Tomorrow might be too late,” insisted Dave. “What if somebody kidnapped Aura and they’re holding her hostage or something?”

“That wouldn’t make sense son, if somebody kidnapped Aura they wouldn’t call you on her cell phone because it could be traced,” reasoned the Captain. Remember Occam’s razor: whenever there’s more than one possible solution to a complex problem the simplest one is probably the right one.” The simplest solution in this case is that one of her sorority sister’s is playing a dirty trick on her, or maybe it’s part of some hazing ceremony, or a perverted initiation into a secret sisterhood?”

While they talked, Dave’s cell phone rang again and another even more explicit, graphic and disgusting picture of the most private part of the female anatomy came across and this one included a wine bottle. Dave was totally exasperated, worried and frustrated, but he was at a loss about what to do. Suddenly he remembered that his i-Phone was interfaced with Aura’s i-Phone and their i-Pods.

Dave spoke into his i-Phone: “Find Aura Marina Macintosh.”

The computer voice asked, “Do you mean Irene Elizabeth Macintosh?”

“Yes,” said Dave.

The GPS locater soon found the location of her cell phone—it was at the same address and co-ordinates as her dormitory and a great wave of relief washed over Dave.

The Captain asked Dave for another look at the second image to see if there were any clues that he might have missed, but it was a close up and the background revealed nothing but a blurred toilet, the only thing that seemed out of place was the toilet seat was in an “up” position and that would not be the normal position for a toilet seat in a women’s bathroom.

Early the next morning Dave took his dad’s dinghy to the ferry dock for his fast approaching return to school, but he stopped first at the fresh fruit stand by the ferry dock.

“How you bean Shark Boy?” asked the vendor, “Did the Captain get a deer this year?”

“We shot three deer,” exclaimed Dave.

“What you mean man, by we Shark Boy? You got a mouse in your pocket?” said the fruit vendor.

Dave ignored his question and tried to call Aura again. He wanted, in the worst way, to catch the next flight to Burlington, NJ and find out what the heck was going on. But it was out of the question, not only was he behind at school but his football team was playing in a championship game the next weekend and his team was depending on him.

Dave got Aura’s voice mail again; she must be in the shower, at breakfast, or something. The ferryboat arrived and Dave was on his way to Red Hook again and then a bus trip to school. His dad had asked him while they were hunting, why he bothered to bring his schoolbooks because he never opened them. Dave answered, “That’s what plane and ferry boat rides are for.” To be continued.