Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh I just have to tell you; Wayne and me, or is it Wayne and I? This crazy English, actually American language is so confusing at times. I know what they say down South; they just say, “We’uns” and Ya’ll.” Anyway, we got caught in a bad rainstorm last week. There was lightening, and thunder, and wind, and rain and hail by the bucket full, and I don’t know what all, hitting Caddy, with us inside. Talk about being scared, Wayne was screaming to bloody murder whatever that means. Anyway I’m glad we keep clean, dry underwear packed in a bag in the trunk along with some sweat suits and spare socks. We didn’t have a dry stitch on our bodies and that was just going from the little country store to the car and not completely as a result of being scared.
When the weatherman says, “Take shelter,” he means what he says. You don’t fool around let me tell you. We thought it would be OK riding out the storm in the car but it was so scary I’ll never do that again. At one time Wayne thought he could outrun the storm coming in from the West by driving east. We may have been going 50 – 60 miles per hour but the storm was going 60 – 70 miles per hour and it didn’t have to slow down for traffic lights, curves, detours, and stop signs. We gave up the race and pulled into a church parking lot. This was not a good idea in that God doesn’t always spare church parking lots. We did maneuver Caddy to where the church was between the storm and us or is it we? Anyway the church blocked the wind and I think kept the debris from doing any real damage to Caddy’s windows and paint.
When we got a lull in the storm, we headed for home. On the way home we noticed the sun was out and we saw a double rainbow. It looked like there had never been a storm of any kind except for the leaves that were scattered everywhere. After we got home it darkened up and the sky opened up again and gave us all what for. It rained harder than when we were in Caddy. The storm got so bad we lost our electricity and the air conditioner doesn’t work without it so we spent a few hours literally sweating it out. The electricity came back on at about three o’clock in the morning and we got up and turned off the lights and tried to go to sleep but it was no use.
Wayne wanted to do something to occupy the time and calm himself down so I told him to go ahead; I wanted to read a book. You know he pouts when he doesn’t get his way? Do all men do that? I mean what he wanted to do calms me down sometimes too but I really didn’t want to work a jigsaw puzzle right then. Reading a boring book will put me to sleep after just a few pages. Now sex is a different story.
Anyway, we drove around Waynedale after it got light out and you should have seen the trees that had fallen down. The weatherman said that the ground was so saturated with water that it weakens a tree’s root system and the wind will just blow it over. This one fell onto a house but it really only did some minor damage as to what it could have caused if it had gone the other way and hit a car. I understand that one did fall and hit a car and killed a man someplace south of here in a little town below Huntington. Anyway, don’t take storms lightly and do what the weatherman says and for heavens sake don’t try to out run them. Trust me; you’ll never get your underwear completely clean again.
Now I have some sad news that I must pass on to you; one of my favorite restaurants has stopped serving free coffee to seniors like I have reported several times in the past. Even though their food is great bordering on excellent, I’m switching our occasional morning outing breakfasts to any restaurant that will be kinder to our social security checks. I just thought all you Waynedale seniors should know. I’ll keep you informed of “Senior Friendly” restaurants that I’ve come across in our fair city of Waynedale.
I want to thank those of you who have sent in positive letters about my little old column. One of you on the other hand, wrote and suggested what I could do with it. The +’s did out weight the –‘s though and that makes Alex and Mike happy but I didn’t get a raise.
Until next time, TAA TAAA.
“Wayne, do you want to . . . .work on a puzzle?”